Post-Concerto

I know it’s been a little while, but I still wanted to give everyone an update on how my concerto went because I know that people are dying to know.

Overall, I would say that it went very well. Of course I made some mistakes, but I think that is expected. Part of the practice is how you react and navigate moving forward after you made a mistake.

In my last post, I think I touched on visualization for my concerto and I used that more.

About 20 minutes before I was set to perform, I just sat down, closed my eyes, and visualized out my whole entire performance. I could see myself on the stage and I had all my affirmations in my head. I am…confident, relaxed, excited, ready, fulfilled, satisfied, bold, proud, happy. And also other feelings that you wouldn’t necessarily think up for a performance, but doesn’t hurt to have. Like… beautiful, supported, and seen. Because in an important performance like this, it’s nice to remember that what is going on isn’t just a piece your playing, it’s telling a story and building a connection with the audience.

On stage, the lights were super bright. In all of my careful thinking, I didn’t plan for that. It was so blinding that the edge of my vision was a tad blurry, like being out of focus on camera.

At one point in time, I got off of the orchestra. But it was okay because my long lived vision was coming alive in my head and I kept calm along with all the other affirmations in my head. And I think that that meant more to me than the music did. Living into my expectations and keeping calm. So, I listened to the orchestra and came in on my next entrance. It was beautiful and the perfect experience.

Afterwards I got a receiving line with friends and family with their arms full of flowers and cards. That really touched me, especially since I’ve only seen some of those people a few times since the pandemic started.

I would say that this has been a big mile-stone for me. Something I’ve been dreaming about, planning, working towards, and it’s amazing to see it come to fruition.

A side note, it was raining on my way to my concerto and I used the umbrella that FMA generously gave to me. I’ll admit that before this, I thought that umbrellas were only used by soccer moms, businessmen who take the bus to work, and generally people waiting outside in lines. So, even though I’ve lived in Seattle my whole life, I’ve rarely used an umbrella –instead getting drenched in a raincoat when it rains. And I would have to say that I make it work. In the past I’ve put plastic bags inside other bags or backpacks that I’ve used so that the contents inside doesn’t get wet. But, this umbrella I got — I am so glad that I gave it a chance and used it for my concerto. It was a life saver to not get my wet in my formal attire on the way to my concerto. Even though I have used umbrellas in the past on the rare occasion, I would have to say that this is the best quality umbrella that I ever used. It was super light weight, had a cool sky design on the inside, and was sturdy in the way that one could tell that the wind would not break it. So, I have learned to be very appreciative of umbrellas, especially the one that was given to me by FMA.